The triumphant culmination of India's space program has been ruined by the revelation that it was all the result of a prank call.
Kevin Spoor, an unemployed bricklayer from Tottenham, London, has confessed to calling the Indian Space Research Organisation to order a home delivery of chicken korma, pilau rice, nan bread and two Kingfisher beers.
"It just seemed like a funny idea, to give our address as 'Sea of Tranquillity, the moon, ring top bell'," said a contrite Spoor. "But that was, like, ten years ago, and I'd forgotten all about it."
Ganesh Mukhurdjee, the astronaut who arrived on the moon in the early hours of this morning on a heavily modified moped, radioed a message to say that the food was spoiled and that he was worried it would come out of his wages.
In the meantime, Spoor — who describes his hobbies as 'having a laugh' and 'robbing' — says he was surprised by the arrival on the Indian spacecraft on the moon. "I mean, the moon's English, innit? I'll thump anyone who says any different."
On being told, via mobile text message, that the British had never had a manned space program, let alone landed anyone on the moon, Spoor replied: "That can't be right. In any case, it's not bleedin' Indian is it? Bloody immigrants come over here. Next thing you know, one's moved into the planetary body next door."
The Indian Government has announced that it intends to follow-up on its achievement by establishing a base on the moon, just as soon as it can find suitable flock wallpaper.